my flu is getting worst

Im still awake. I couldn’t sleep. I tried to sleep since 3am after I took flu medicine. The medicine is not helping at all. I was struggling hard to make myself sleep bt I failed. I was so cold. My flu keeps dripping. I keep hakchiu. My head feels so heavy. I wear sweater. I blanket myself from head to toe so that I’ll sweat, so that I wont feel that hit but I still feel damn cold.

This is the worst flu I ever had in UTAR. Usually I’ll recover after I sleep but not this time. I’ve used my effective method-take med, blanket head to toe, clos all the windows, switch off the fan, make myself sweat-this time, it’s not working.

Seriously I feel like fainted. My eyes hardly open but I cannot sleep. My jaw is painful. I don’t understand at all why I cannot sleep.

I FEEL LIKE DYING.

I prayed juz now when I was trying to sleep. It didn’t work. Aih..

I didn’t see doctor because I took medicine already. Furthermore, I’m not the kind of person who sikit-sikit see doctor. If it’s normal sickness, I’ll just rest at home. This time, my heavy flu is quite heavy. My running nose is quite serious. I tak larat to move around.

I feel bad for my roommate, Siang Yong. He has recovered. He’s not having good night sleep because of me.

Time-time susah like this, I think of her. I feel like calling her, tel her what happened. But I don’t even exist in her mind anymore. it has been almost a week since we talk or sms. I sms her bt she nvr replied. I’ve been her bf, her fren, her enemy n noe I don’t exist. I always said to her:

“if 1 day i die pun, u also wont know.”

I also think of my family, my mum. If she knows, she’ll definitely ask me to go see doctor. If I were in Penang, she’ll take medicine for me.

Have u ever feel lonely when you are sick? Have you ever think of your loved ones when you are sick? Have you ever felt worried that u might lost them?

Ok.. now im feeling so hungry. I didn’t take dinner last night. I guess I’ll strive hard to ride my bike to have hot noodle soup.