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Wednesday, 14 April 2010

sleep as if u gona die

SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP!

I have been sleeping for these 2 weeks. N I sleep as if im gona die. I sleep as if im not gona wake up anymore. I had nightmaresssssssssss!! I was shivering! Then I sweat! grrrrhh!

I skipped quite a lot of classes these 2 weeks.

I really duno why I cannot wake up. I tried to but I just can’t. my body n my mind are not working. They resist my command. They never listen to what I want! They are damn LAZY! And then I got flu. I got fever. Stomach is pain again. n again!

At the end of the day, im the victim,. Im the victim for my own behaviour.

I hate myself so much for being like that.

Im stress. I freak out everytime I thought the reports I have to submit before the deadline. I tried to hide myself up but time still flies.

Something is wrong with me by the end of this semester. Presentations and midterms were ok. but now the reports part, I screw up.

I know myself that I am not ok, emotionally. I know but I can’t figure out the reason. When im outside with friends, I ok. but when im alone in my room, the dark clouds just cover my entire room n my life. I feel like i need to hug someone. A guy or a girl, it's ok. I just need a hug. A big hug. A long hug.

No, I don't miss her.

But i feel like im missing someone. The feeling of missing someone is so strong that i don't even know who's the person im missing. What the heck im talking about?!! I miss someone la but someone that doesn't exist? grrrrhhh! Home sick perhaps? Or maybe because im stress up because of assignments?

Anyway, Im glad I finished 1 report already n 2 more to go.

Everyone delays their works. Everyone procrastinates. But we must not live in it! Fight it. Overcome it.

I wish this week will ends soon. And then I wana sleep again until my final. I dun wana wake up…seriously. I dun wana face anyone. I dun wana lepak jalan-jalan. I dun wana take pics. I dun wana eat. I dun wana talk. I dun wana online. I dun wana bath. I dun wana go out form my room. I dun wana do anything at all. I just don’t want.. that’s how I feel right now.

And don’t ask me why. Cuz I don’t know why..

I need to be alone.. yes.. just to be alone for tonight. N I wont be at home tonight. N I’ll stay awake till tomorrow morning.

Oh ya! Tonight got pasar malam but im not going. Tomorrow is the last day of Sushi Bonanza! Yumyum! I WANT!! =p

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