Heritage row in Kampar burnt down

This photo was taken on 18/1/2011

To those Kamparians and UTARians, I’m sure you know where this place is. I just want to let you all know that this row of shops/houses in Old Town, Kampar has destroyed due to the fire that broke out on Monday morning/Sunday midnight.

My heart crashed into pieces when I heard the news. I have fond memories of that place. This is the oldest row of wooden shops/houses that is still around in Kampar. It’s older than the pre-war houses at the surroundings. It’s a historical place. The tin miners used to stay here too.

Do you know that the film “Kinta”, if you jeard of it, was filmed here?

I’m still sad with the loss. I just love that place because of the feel. I have lots of good memories in Kampar and that row of shops/houses. I remember there were bicycle shops, kopitiams, grocery shops, a fresh vegetarian shop and some residences.

The structures are testament of older generation that still living in the developing Kampar. Every morning you’ll see market goers and senior citizens dropping by this place, have a sip of coffee, hang out and chit chats with their friends.  

I haven’t captured and documented the shops in details. I guess I don’t have the chance anymore now.

But at least I had conversations with the people living or making business in the units. And I have the senior citizens’ photos are in my Ah Kong Ah Ma album too. =p

If my memory does not disappoint me, there was a talk in year 2010 that the row of shops/houses and other rows of houses at the back will be taken back by the land owner for development puposes. The other rows have been demolished in 2011. But I’m not sure why this particular row remained until today.

I’m humbly glad that I’ve captured this place in panorama. At least we know how it used to looks like before.

The structures may be gone, but the stories, souls and spirits live on.

When I’m back to Kampar this Saturday, I’ll go there and have my last documentation of it. 

*You can read the news of the fire here http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2012/10/15/nation/20121015112007&sec=nation *

This is one of the photo I took at that place.

no gold but you are the hero Lee Chong Wei

Hati teramat sakit bagaikan ditikam pisau, diselar parang, dihiris penknife. ouch. sakit hor? damn heartbroken arghhh. u ppl wana get MC anot tmr? let's mourn in silence. oh u r my hero Lee Chong Wei. It's ok, im proud of u. so do others, othou some will sure hentam u. Malaysian spirit is roaring in the air!


NO GOLD BUT YOU ARE OUR HERO LEE CHONG WEI!

bila putus sudah cinta

Sejak dari kecil, saya selalu berfikir dan percaya.

Apa yang penting dalam keluarga bukanlah wang semata-mata tapi kasih dan sayang.

Wang itu besar, dengan wang, segala benda boleh dibeli, segala kekurangan boleh ditempuhi.

Tapi gembirakah anda  jika wang yang ada tak membawa kebahagiaan

Tanpa kasih, tanpa sayang, tanpa cinta, tanpa percaya, tiadalah keluarga.

Rumah akan jadi hotel. Balik untuk makan, mandi, tidur dan keluar.

Apakah itu rumah jika tiada perpaduan, tiada penghormatan, tiada percakapan?

Paksaan tak membawa kegembiraan.

Bila anak dipaksa melakukan apa yang diimpikan oleh mak bapa, hasilnya adalah kesedihan.

Bila anak mengikut jalan sendiri, dia diebnci sebenci-bencinya oleh si bapa.

DI mana silapnya?

Pilih kasih semakin menebal. Apa saja yang dibuat ada yang tak kena. Kerja anak dipandang hina. Gaji sikit tapi dipaksa bagi dja lebih.

Dituduhnya anak berjudi bola. Dituduhnya itu dan ini, bulan dan bintang,

Dalam hati, dalam minda, anak itu kotor, tak guna.

Sejak kecil, ayat ayat ‘you tak berguna, you pergi mati lebih baik, mati cepat aman cepat’ berkumandang di angkasa.

Sekarang dituduhnya anak itu mencuri wang dari poket seluarnya.

Segala plot cerita dia yang reka.

Tiada siapa tahu yang benar mahupun yang dusta.

Bukankah dia anak mu juga.

Hati sungguh sayu dan pedih melihat apa yang di depan mata.

Apa yang boleh dibuat melainkan berdoa.

Diri ini tersepit di tengah-tengah dilemma.

Bila sudah tiada cinta, maka kosonglah jadinya.

Bila yang longgar makin longgar, yang jauh makin jauh, maka yang akhirnya..

Putus.

Putus.

Tak mengapa.

Kerana cinta sudah tiada..

TAMAT

“You don’t tell him you know. Nevermind if he wants to take. It’s ok to give money to son. You keep an eye on him. Do you see him bet on football or use a lot of money? You don’t tell mum you know.”


*akan ku rahsiakan perkara dari dia dan dia yang ada di rumah, supaya hati siapa-siapa tidak akan parah*

quote of the day

Good or bad, sweet or sour, easy or hard, react to it just for a while, then accept it and move on. There are so much things waiting for you to be done. Time doesn’t wait for you. Keep life meaningful. 

jobless depression

It has been so long since i wrote about myself, about me and not other things that i'm interested in. WHy care what others think of you? Just be true of yourself. Express what you feel. You can cheat the whole world but you can't lie to yourself.

I don't know why today so dull..

It's like so quiet..

And i feel lonely..

I just feel uneasy, so directionless.

i guess it's because of my job.

It's either i'm being stupid, stubborn or persistent because i only apply for one job.

I gave myself time until end of February before i start working.

Unfortunately i am still jobless. And till now i am still waiting for their answer. I've gone through all the process. They shortlisted me. Then asked me go for medical check up at their panel clinic last week. The blood test takes so long one meh..

It's either there's something wrong with my health or i don't get the job. I will go crazy if in these few days before February ends, they tell me i don't get the job.

Then i will have to apply for new jobs all over again. Lepas tu nak tunggu dipanggil interview, nak tunggu results bla bla bla. Bila baru boleh start kerja ni??

Anyone free to talk to me? ahaha.. Close friends in Penang all busy. Everytime ask them out for teh tarik, it's either they are working or they are lazy. But in the weekends, they can go out in a geng. zzz.. When u are away for 3 years, things change. No one's fault. It happened naturally. People always look for friends with similar interest to stick together. I'm into politics. I don't play games. I love history. I'm into human rights n activism. In short, i am just weird, not into any group.

It's not a problem, i feel good doing things alone. But you still need friends. I am happy to have them around. They are there when i need help and they know me well. But what's the point i only see them when i need help. As if i only look for them when i am in trouble.

Aih.. mum keeps nagging. Some people pula simply accuse this n that... oh what a night!

For once, i feel so useless. I feel so helpless.

Any magazine house, publishing company, newspaper agencies or event company want to hire a photographer? =p

PENANTIAN ITU SATU PENYEKSAAN

right brain right attitude

brain

attitude

brain

attitude

You must have the right things to be a right person.

You have have the right brain and right attitude in life.

I have the right brain but i don't have the right attitude.

democracy buried alive

Demokrasi sudah mati,

terkubur dalam-dalam

di dalam liang hahad.

Aku hak aku

Tapi hari ini

Kebebasan ku dirampas

Aku kalah menjadi diri sendiri

Aku diikat tali

Dipaksa mengikut apa kamu suka


Minoriti dipersenda
Yang kecil bilangannya dibuli
Tak pernah kau hormat 
Si kaum minoriti
Orang Asal dipijak
Kini LGBTIQ dilanyak

Kau manusia

Aku manusia

Siapa kau

Kau siapa

Untuk menghakimi aku

Sebaik-baik aku

Sejahat-jahat aku

Biar Tuhan yang tentukan

Bukan kau!

Aku berhak

Memilih cara hidup sendiri

Dan orientasi seks serta jantina sendiri.

It’s a sad thing that Seksualiti Merdeka Festival has just been banned by the police force.

What is wrong with the festival? If you don’t like, you don’t go. If you don’t agree with them, you don’t ban them and if you hate them, you can choose not to be friend with them.

It’s as simple as that.

Education has been politicized. Religion has been politicized. Now, sex and gender are being politicized.

This is my country, Malaysia.

Democracy has buried alive.

Democracy belongs to all.

I learnt in my religion, Pendidikan Moral, Pengajian Am, Pengajian Malaysia, 1 Malaysia and from the society to accept everyone for who they are. I learnt to respect and understand them.

There must be equal rights and human dignity not just for ourselves, but also for those who are different ie. straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, intersex, transgender, asexual, unsure or simply fabulous.

Any festival that has to do with them is now illegal. I wonder will these people be arrested. Will these words (straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, intersex, transgender, asexual) be censored from the press, tv and radio.

Will I be arrested for having them as my friends? Will I be arrested if I ever use those words.

I still believe this is a democratic country.

I hope I was wrong when I think that democracy has flushed away like the shit i just produced.


54 years of independence? Merdekakah kita?


I have no idea..

please.. have mercy on my FYP

A note to my friends. I thank you from deep inside my heart for helping me to complete my FYP questionnaire. I chose you specifically because i trust you out of so many people. But please be considerate, don't spoil it. If you don't understand, you can ask your friends or me. If you don't feel like doing it, you have all the rights in the world not to do it. I never force you. But don't simply tick and simply type rubbish words on the answer box. I'm just asking for a small favour and a few minutes of your life to answer a few simple questions. Why must you spam, hack, and ruin it? Don't you feel it's very irresponsible, childish and stupid? There are at least 3 respondents who did that and this is very sad lo. You can hate me. You can talk bad about me. You can spam my wall. But please don't ruin my work. Please.. Thank you. 


May you be blessed always..


*Whatever bad things you do to people today, it will come back and haunt you in the future. Mark my words.*

QUOTE of the day

Life is like a candle. Once it's blowed off, means no more light, no more life.

*so sad to received a news that a very close neighbour's mum has passed away*

people i want to meet

My internship is ending very soon.

About one week from now, I’ll be leaving KL.

Time flies so fast. I’m here in KL for 3 months already.

I still have many things that I wana do here but time is running out.

I feel a bit sad for leaving this place especially the people here.

What makes me stronger each day staying in this concrete and alien jungle is friendship. Without friends, my life will be so dull.

They lighted up my life. They added colours to KL.

I may forget to thanks them in person all the time, but I thank them deep inside my heart and I keep them in my prayers. I remember them.

There are people who i already met but I wana meet them again. And there are people who I haven’t met and I definitely want to meet them before I go back to Penang.

Well, they are not superstars, VIPs or celebrities. They are friends..

I know it will be hard because I wana meet so many people and we all have our own things to do. I’m here for only about 7 days. I’m working everyday from morning till late evening and I’m involved in a theatre production every night. I haven’t done cleaning my room and packing my luggage.

Haih..

Anyhow, I would still love to meet up and have a short chat with you..

Miss Joethi

Adeline Wok

Agkillah

Yam Phui Yee

Rafeeza

Nora Murat

Geng Qian

Song Heart

Drop by my place whenever you are free. I don't have my own transport here.

*i perasan yang takda laki-laki. i duno why. laki-laki tak pandai in communication kot. ahaha.*

Hou Lai 后来 - Liu Ruo Ying 劉若英

This is a very nice song. The first time i heard it was during my primary school time.

I don't know the meaning of this song bt i just love the melody, it represents how i feel right now.

I'm sad. I'm so heartbroken.

My eyes are teary.

So long never feel this sad for losing in a competition.

sedih arrghhhhh.

It's saddening when u dun get wat u want after u tried ur best. Someone else’s works r better than mine.. Nvm.. no rezeki.. apa nak buat?

Alright..

sleep la.

Good night.

tata.

LESSON OF THE DAY!!

1) Sometimes to get what you want, there’s no such thing as ethics.

2) Jolok first, talk later.


3) No matter what, must not go back office empty-handed.

QUOTE of the day

You may have a good beginning but a bad ending.

farewell to Penang

Finally the time has come after a 2 enjoyable week semester break in Penang.

I am leaving today at 11.45am. Destination? Kuala Lumpur.

I'll b there for 3 months internshipin NTV7 starting next Monday.

But i have to go earlier to settle some stuff and attend a programme.

Well, somehow, my dream comes true. I can go far to do what i love to do.

but..

I am sad..

I am sad that I'm leaving my family to somewhere so far than Kampar, and for 3 months long.

I know 3 months will end very fast.

I know i'll see a lot of new different things and meet a lot of people.

I hope everything will be fine. I hope i can stand with KL's life. and I hope there'll be more opportnities for me in KL.

I am truly excited for my new life and i'm nervous too.

ok i have to go.

Haven't done with packing yet. hahaa.

My brother will send me to bus station later with car. got 3 BIG bags to bring ma..

ok people. see you. Penang byebye. KL hi hi. =p

i, am not ok..

UTAR Ball has taken a toll on my life.

The event is over but the mess is not over yet. I just hope as a team, everyone will bear the responsibilities together. This is our event and not my event. Don’t just quit or pin-point when we are in troubles.

A lecturer just told me that he will deduct my marks. Ok.. Yea because I didn’t do well in my coursework. I deserved that. Even if I give him what he needs now, no use already.

Oh besides that, I didn’t submit an assignment which due last week. Haha. What the fark am I doing right. It’s all my mistake. Not that I didn’t do but I can’t finish it. I slept at 4.30amon Thursday. Woke up so early on Friday and work on the ball whole day. Saturday is about UTAR Ball again.

Im living in the world of worries and insecurity every single day...

I screwed up my assignments. My studies drop like shit. I’m totally not happy with my life now.

Whenever my friends see me, they’ll ask am I ok, why am I looking down, tired and stress. They see it themselves that I am not ok.

I am really not ok.

Since beginning of March, everything seems so disorganized. Everything seems not ok.

Whenever I try to settle something, there will be sure some other things popped up to be settled. At the end, many things are unsettled.

You know.. I am tired n down. I skipped a lot of classes this semester.

I am worried. I am so so worried.

I’ve totally no mood to talk to anyone. I get angry so easily. I lost my patience when I talk to people, even people who I’m close with.

What can I do now? What should I do now? What choice do I have?

The final exam is the only way I can save myself. The only way. Please, don’t bother me with event’s problems anymore, I had enough. Just give me a break please. Let me alone. At least for these 2 weeks until I’ve done with my final exam.

PRIORITY!

Now, my internship is still in limbo. The company hasn’t reply to my lecturer. I told him that I don’t wana intern in UTAR.

He was so happy when he knew that we can intern in UTAR. What the fark man, who wants to intern in his/her university? I DON’T WANT!! Now is week 14 and no answer from the company yet. Then what should the students do? We live in fear every day, afraid that we can’t go out to do internship, afraid that we must stay in UTAR to do our internship. Can the lecturer please help us out? Please..

He’s like cincai cincai all the time. sorry la but this is how I’m feeling.

Arrrghhhhh!

Seriously don’t ask me to do anything else. I am fed up. Suddenly here not enough money, there not enough money. Must attend this meeting and that meeting. Suddenly money hilang. Suddenly have to settle some stuff and rush to university. Oh ya not to forget ongoing, continuously INCOMING CALLS, SMS, and FB NOTIFICATIONS! Halo what kind of life is this??

YES I AM COMPLAINING! GO AWAY IF YOU DON’T WANA LISTEN.

I am now giving away giving up everything in my hand for studies. Ok?

DON’T ask me for photos unless it’s necessary. Politics? Get off!

I’ll read less news, care less, totally less Facebook-ing, take less photos, sleep less, still going to eat more and STUDY!

I don’t know what’s gona happen if I flunk my final exam. NO! that’s NOT gona happen!

I am so in a mess right now. Don’t believe me? Look at the photo or you are welcome to my room. I’m not hiding anything and telling people how good I am because I am so not in a good position right now…

I.. Am not OK..

biggest mistake in my life

I just made the biggest mistake in my life.

Instead, I made it few months ago, in 2010.

If I ever persevere, stick to my principle, all these wouldn’t happen.

I never wanted UTAR Ball. NEVER! UTAR Ball, ball night, events, entertainment, girls, party are never in my mind. That’s not the reason why I joined SRC.

My biggest mistake was I accepted explanation and persuasion from Dr Teh and support and agreement from my own committee.

It was a mistake. It is a mistake.

It’s all my fault. I’m a weak leader.

This is the biggest defeat in my life.

Yes we managed to pull it through. We have to change the venue from Tambun Lost World to Kampar Club. Majority of the people who came were extremely happy. They were partying crazily, screaming, and enjoying themselves to the max. They were laughing all the way and it’s a good thing because that’s the point of continuing this event.

While they were enjoying themselves, I was standing there at one corner, looking at them while my mind at somewhere else, thinking, cracking my head on how to solve the financial problem.

I am totally not feeling happy. People are laughing happily but my tears are flowing, heart aches bitterly to the max.  

Fingers will soon be pointing to one direction, to me.

I just hope that miracles will happen.

I just hope that I won’t be alone.

Actually why am I so sad? Yea I already made a big mistake by allowing this event to takes place ever since from January 2011. But I’m even more sad when there’s trouble, everyone is running away. Many people are quitting. Many fingers are pointing to me and I’m talking about my own committee members!

Like Hong Leong said, the lesson is I must be firm. I must dare to make my decision as a chairman and all will have to follow my words.

Yea it’s ideally that way but in reality, that scenario can never happened in the team.

Throughout the whole event, I got to see more of the real faces of people. Some people have their wn agenda. Some people are taking advantage of the networks, financial, friends, girls, reputation etc.

And some, they really put their heart and mind into making this event a success. In this group of people, those who really worked as I observed, are the innocent ones.

I thought after tonight, I’ll be free but no. There are damages that have to be repaired. There are messes to be cleared. There are debts to be paid.

Despites all the obstacles and problems we faced, we made it happened. I must thank all the committee members, helpers, sponsors, performers, university, Sahara, Kampar Club, participants and friends. Thanks a lot.

Thanks to the 4 committee members and 6 helpers who stayed back till the end, till midnight to clean up. Thanks to the girl who said this to me, “May God bless you.”

Thank you. Yea I know the god has been blessing me and I don’t ask for anything more. Hope you guys will be blessed as well.

I am gona silent my phone and sleep till God knows what’s the time. I’m not gona pick up any calls or reply any sms-es.

I..made the biggest mistake in my life.

*It’s easy to avoid responsibility than to bear responsibility.

away..

This is gona be a very long long post..

Thoughts keep pouring in. yea it’s like the rain pouring non-stop. My body is tired but mind is still working.

I’ll be away..

Away..

I’ll be away.. away from communication with people. Away from talking to people. Away from making any comments and expressing myself. I’ll be away.

From now onwards, I I shall try my best not make any statements in Facebook anymore. I’ll just use my blog as FB, post my thoughts and opinions. Well, at least when I use my blog, not much people will notice it. I can even store what I said here. I have more freedom and I don’t have to be worried people will give crazy comments.

I am tired.. everyone is tired too.

I put away everything for this event. Like others, I sacrificed as much time, effort, money and energy as I could. Last year in December, I said to the ex-chairman and the team that this event must be done greatly and properly if not all our efforts all this while to clean the name of SRC will be destroyed. I said our name is at stake, our reputation is at stake and we couldn’t let that happen. This is a very risky event.

But now everything is macam taik. I screwed up my studies and assignments. I have no time for myself. My relationship with friends got affected. I lost a lot of opportunities in life. I have to give up many things because of this UTAR Ball.

I need some rest..

I am not running away. I just need time for myself. I’ll bear the responsibilities as the chairman because I am the chairman. When my team has problem, I should always support and back them up no matter what.

The whole event taught me a lot of things. I’ve seen a lot of things from my eyes, but most importantly from my heart..

I learnt to know more about human beings. I’ve learnt so much, much more in these 3 weeks than in my 20 years of life.

One of the lessons I learnt, don’t be last minute in decision making. If not, you die, die badly. what i mean here is, if you already make up your mind, don't change it last minute due to pressure or influence from people.

And don’t trust anyone so much. Most importantly, one must be firm in decision-making.

I also noticed that when there are troubles, people will escape. Hmmm.. Aren't we supposed to support each other?

well, i guess it's true what one of the HOD told me: it's human nature.

The event is definitely not the best perhaps the most sucks one but I guess I have one of the best experiences in my life.

Only the inside people know what actually going on throughout the whole event. As for the outsiders, they deserved the right to be angry. What I wish is that everyone tries to calm down and understand the whole situation instead of continuing scolding, blaming, condemning and insulting us. The fact is not gona change.

Things already happened. No point blaming anyone.

Reputation? Image? Good name? bla bla bla.. for me, it’s important but it’s not the most important thing after all. If you have good record, people know it. If you work hard you can have good reputation too. Reputation and be earned back if we work hard.

No matter what decision we make now, our reputation will be tarnished. This is an unchanged fact. Whatever you do now also people marah. You cancel, people marah. You postponed people also marah. You change venue people also marah. So marah la but the show will goes on! For sure, we can never continue in Tambun because of the 20k deficit.

No matter what, I’ll just ends off what I’ve started. Do or don’t do, the results are gona be the same. So why don’t give it one last shot, give it another chance and do or best? It’s better to try to do and die than to die and never try at all. Everyone in the team has done their best, did all they could. So I’ll give my best for the event despite all the unhappiness and criticisms. I don’t wana regret later on.

After this event, I’ll do what I like to do. I’ll eat what I like to eat. I’ll go wherever I like to go. I’ll say whatever I like to say in my blog. Like it or not, I’ll be who I am. Afterall, who are we to decide what people wana think of us?

I’ll be as low profile as possible. I never wish to get appreciation or recognition from anyone for my works or talents or knowledge or whatsoever things I can deliver. I do it willingly. I do it cuz I can and cuz I wana contribute.

This is most probably gona be the very last event im gona do. I don’t belong to this kind of community. For smaller events, I was a lone ranger. People don’t share what my principles, beliefs, ideologies and ideas. Normal la.. so I’ll just do my own things, do it myself and no need to put others in.

I never have such defeat before. This is the first time and the biggest one.

And most importantly I won’t involve in anything anymore. I’m not good and I’m not capable at all. There are so many people who are 10 times better than me. I’ll only screw up things. I’ll just be an observer and help out when needed.

Sorry for everything from A to Z. if you feel I made mistakes in any ways, I’m sorry. Thank you too everything good things that you have done to me and to the team. You have worked your ass off, putting too much efforts with sleepless nights plus the time and money you spent.

There’s no way I can repay everyone’s good deeds. What I can do is to pray and wish to the religion that i believed in that you’ll be blessed, healthy always and success in your life. I believe good people will have good repay.

Thank you also to everyone who's still with us, supporting us and continue their participation in this event.

Thank you again to everyone for all your help. Thanks to friends who care. Thanks to those who try to understand me and the whole situation. Your words of encouragement do make the difference.

It’s all my fault la. If I chose to end it 1 month earlier, the damages won’t be as great as now. There will be less people affected. But every decision comes with a price right. Anything can happen. Life is not always that beautiful.

I just can’t wait for Saturday night because after that I am free. I can get away and runaway.. after this I can be a normal student again. I can focus on my studies, on my personal lives and things that I enjoy to do.

Well, I should stop here now. If not I can continue to rant and talk and talk till tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow cuz I still have a lot in my mind.

Have a good rest la everyone as we have to finish our task nicely tomorrow. I need to go now as I’m going to puke anytime soon..

* lone ranger is good. =p

yes i'm skinny, so??

Many people, too many to count, too many to remember who are they, commenting that I am skinny ever since I’m just a kid until today.

Er.. ok.. how should I response to this.

Everytime they say something about this, I’ll just listen because what can I do? I have pocket-sized body and so what?? Some adults will even question whether my parents never feed me is it or whether I’m too poor to eat.

And also the normal comments:

“Ayooo skinny la you!” “Why you so skinny one?” “You are so skinny la.”

What the fark??

So what if people are skinny?! Mana u sakit??

Why we always criticize and judge other’s appearance?

Don’t we all going to die at the end of the day?

Stop being so judgmental, so negative, so rude and so sarcastic. Come on people!

Many people scared and feel shy of their appearance. Many people wana change their physical appearance like wear braces, get plump, get skinner, put heavy make up and so on. Why so care?? It’s ok.. everyone has flaw in themselves. Take it as an advantage rather than a disadvantage. No one is perfect. As long as the heart is nice ma can already lo.

This is me, take it or leave it. If you choose a friend because of their appearance, then you TAK LAYAK to be called as a friend. A friend doesn’t choose their friends by the appearance. Accept others if you want other to accept you.

knife in the heart

Tonight is the most painful night ever in Kampar for this semester.

i feel so hard to close my eyes and sleep.

I try so hard not to think of what they said but the pain is already there.

The wound is getting bigger.

It keeps bleeding.

The pain is totally unbearable.

Words are soul killer.

When it is already being said, it can't be retract.

Let's try to imagine this, a knife just cut ur hand, and it's expose to air, water and salt, how do u feel?

That's not the worse.

I'm feeling as if a long sharp blade just stabbed and pierced through my heart.

My pulse is getting faster.

My body temperature is getting higher.

My heart is physically painful ok..

okok, why should i care so much of what people say.

Because these 2 people are someone to me.

They are the people i love.

yea yea, they don't mean what they say right..

The first person said:

“Go die lah you.”

ok..

that was in the afternoon.

then in the evening, another person said:

“yes u are good of nothing, u only know to blame, u only talk bout urself, do u listen to others?u only know to find me when u nid sum1 to talk,to eat,to revise. u urself is the superior, u are self-centered, u are bad guy....if u stand in my shoes, u will found tht im juz relief to get a reliable, responsible junior, tht's all, nothing much bout da comparison.tok tok tok, wan tok till i die ar? ting tong ting tiang.”

fine.. whatever la.

forgive and forget!

hold no grudge.

you'll only feel happy when you can let go.

Good night.

You and I - Wilco

ahhh.. this song just cheer me up on this emo night.