going back soon

I am leaving at 2pm later from Butterworth. It's about time for me to go back to my university, UTAR in Kampar, Perak. Today 18th Jan 2010 is the first day of my Year 2 Semester 1 of my degree programme. I am looking forward for it. I feel fresh, as if i'm a newbie of university. I miss my classmates so much. I miss them! All of them! They are now in Kampar already.
Before this i was so eager to go back but now i don't really feel it. I miss home and my family. Im not done with my CNY shopping yet. I haven't done the things that i wanted to do here. Sad right. What to do. I want to achieve something that is beyond my capacity. I mean beyond my control, beyond my ability. I just don't have enought time to do all that la..

I usually pack my luggage few hours before i depart. I'm still packing right now. Too many stuffs to bring back to my second home. I guess one of the reasons i'm SO short is because my beg is super heavy! that;s why i can't grow!! GRRHHH! It's also because of my heavy camera. What a lame excuse. haha.

There's 90% more to pack but haha i feel like blogging laaaaaaaaa........... I have so much to say but so little time.

it's already 2.30am now. Everyone at home has already sleeping. I am sleepy, tired after a long day of rushing here and there, busybody care-pochi (kpc) everywhere. I woke up early in the morning. See how good am i. Then i slept again. zzz.. i missed the chance to document a very unique scenario of racial tolerance in Penang where a group of Indians celebrate Ponggal in front of a church. The celebration took place in the church's compound. Unfortunately i was too lazy to wake up.

In the afternoon i went for my first photography course organised for Sony Alpha DSLR users by Sony. It's FREE! Haha. i learned new things. But most of the things i already know lah. I taught people sitting at my left and right. I took model picture for the first time and i feel so urrghh! i never like modelling photography. NEVER! eeww! i just don't feel comfortable. I can't stand people pose here and there, show their boobs asses here and there.. GRRRHHH! no offence k. I'm just not into this kind of photoshoot. Overall, the course was great. A lot of theories were taught. You know i never learn all these. I'm self-taught in photography and i learn by my experience. Afterall i feel, theories are not that important. You need practice, hardwork and heart in photography and you'll produce a good shot.

Before the course ended, i received a phone call at about 5.30pm saying people died at the sea. So i rushed to Lebuh Macallum from Batu Ferringghi. It's very far ok. I nearly got into accident...again for rushing to cover a news. A car was crossing the road in front of me. Suddenly it brakes. WTH!! I got no where to go! So i pressed the break with all the strenghth i had at that time and luckily my bike managed to stop, in front of the car! damn it! I and other cars honk continuosly at the f*cking red Kenari driver. I got to go in to the scene becoz the guard thought that i'm a r*porter. shhhhhhh... hehehe. but i left early bcoz camera run of battery again. aih.. I still remember when i met a reporter, Chin Liang few years ago at a fire scene, my old semi-pro camera that uses AA battery ran out of battery as well. He was the one who lend me batteries. Today i met him again at the scene, but unfortunately my camera uses another type of battery that only fits Sony DSLR. So i had to leave. If i were a real reporter, i'll sure kena sack for failing to capture the news. Anyway 2 people are found dead. LEt's all of us pray that the other 4 missing students are safe.

I took a nap before i went to Batu Feringghi. My mum followed me. I fetched her. heheh. It was such a warm feeling of her sitting on my bike and she said 'can ride not that fast ah?' HAHA. She was comforting me after i didn't get the thing that i need for my public speaking at Batu Feringghi.

I think i'll need few hours to finish packing. By that time, my mum will wake my sister up to school. And i'll send her to school for one last time before i leave. Then, i'll go to the scene where the students fell into the water during a dragon boat training exercise yesterday morning. Then, see my former teacher at my form six school SXI, buy needle for Thaipusam, fotostat soem documents etc etc.

I think that's all i need to do tomorrow.. After i got back to Kampar, definitely i'll blog more. Haha. More unpublished posts will be up.

I also wana take this opportunity to thank Hor Wei Vern for designing my namecard. It's really nice and unique! BETUL!! unik ok!! Look for her if you need a graphic designer.

TRUST ME, 2010 IS GONA BE A BLAST!!

Good night. tata.

a few drop of tears

I was lying on my bed, trying so hard to sleep. My laptop is still playing ‘You and I’ by Michael Buble. But I still cannot sleep.. I’ve been sleeping so late on this island. I slept at 7am yesterday.

Now, after I finish typing this, I think I can sleep well. Why?? Hehe.. I just talked to FELI!! Woohooo!! FELICITA FEDELIS!!  Thanks Feli.

I needed to talk to someone. Im clueless when I need to talk to someone. I have close friends, good buddies, but sometimes I don’t feel comfortable to tell them my personal stuffs. I felt lonely. I felt unfair. I cried. I don’t know why.

Of all so many close friends, I think Feli is the one that I’m so honest with. There’s nothing that I can hide from her. She knows when Im not happy. Sometimes, she’ll just pretend and wait for me to tell her what’s in my mind although she already know it. I trust her. I feel secure to talk to her. I feel calm..

She’s leaving this Saturday. I thought I’ll meet her again but no jodoh.

By the way, she's not a Chinese pun! nor a Buddhist or Taoist or Hindu. I'm ok talking to a non-Chinese. it's not an issue!

There’s something that I keep in my heart for so long. Something that is so hard to say it out. I’ve decided to just keep it as a secret. But someone else who knows it told other people.

I feel being betrayed. Can’t that person show me some respect? Can’t that person think of my feelings and my dignity? I lost friends because of that. That action has left a bad mark on my image.

So what im hiding actually? Do you still remember that I went for a blood test? Yes the blood test is the beginning of all the problems. The blood test is not just about me, but it involves other person as well.

Until this moment, I keep it as a secret. I didn’t tell anyone except God. I swear. I do all this because I respect that person. I care for her privacy. I don’t want anyone to think bad or look down on that person. No one knows what blood test I did. Why in the world all of a sudden I went to do blood test?!! i have faith in myself. I have faith with the people I trust, especially the one that meant a lot for me.. But that person never trust me…

Well, u might not get the same treatment like how you treated people.

Am I that bad huh? Tel me am I that bad??

Aku bukan nak cari publisiti murahan ok!! kalau hangpa tak suka apa I tulis, boleh blah dari blog aku. Aku sekadar ingin mencari ketenangan hidup.

I have no idea how long I can keep this all myself.

Sorry Feli for waking u up in the middle of the night. hehehe. And sorry for the troubles I’ve given you all this while.

You know I love you. =p

*if i cannot sleep, im gona miscall everyone in my hp. =p

you'll always be REMEMBERED

these are the videos that made by James' friends.

i don't know you personally James. but i feel sad by your lost. im sure people who know you feel more pain than i do.

this goes the same to your friends Yew Ghim Chnieh and also Yew Shy Gin. you people will be remembered. May God always bless you wherever you are.

DON'T die before i do

well.. it's time where everyone is sleeping. but im here wiping my tears away. i was finishing the unsettled things that i wanted to do until i came across some videos on the net. it's the videos made to remember James Khor, one of the students who died few days ago.

My tears keep flowing like the gush of water dat swept him n his 2 friends away as I watch the videos made for him. Sometimes I wonder will people remember me when im gone? Will you? I realised human never changed. They will only appreciate you when you are gone. But is that really the only way to show your love?

Arrrghhh! Yellow by Coldplay sang by James’ friends just melt my heart away. Damn it.. my tears just keep flowing. i have downloaded the song. i repeat n repeat listening to it. as im writing this, the song is playing in my laptop.

Im sad someone has just passed away n I haven’t had the chance to know this person yet. i miss them. my heart breaks into pieces knowin dat ppl hav gone n they nvr come bck. they nvr will.. He’s such a jovial person. I once used to be like him, active. he's lovable.

People, let live this life with love and not hatred.

life and death is never in our hand. it's in His. death is just a part of our life. what's the point having so much money or so much fame or so much friends or so much wives or so much stuffs when you can't even bring them when you are gone?? people don't remember for what you have. people remember the things you do, either good or bad, how u touched their heart, what you said and how you carry yourself. it's ok to be yourself but never disgrace, downgrade or humiliate or defame anyone.

people, no mater what you do, remember that there are people out there who love you. no one is born to be hate. there are good qualities in you that people see that you don't.

i want to call da girl dat used to be part of me so badly but i just couldn't do it. i don't have the courage. and it's not gona make any difference if i cal her.

i don't want any of the persons that i know die before i do bcoz i love you ppl. i really do even if i nvr say it 2 your face. pls forgive my wrongdoings.

Students Swept Away...AGAIN

Batu Berangkai, Kampar: Body of James Wan Kai Khor, 20 from Penang was the first of missing victims that was found yesterday by the 2 villagers at about 9.40pm yesterday. He was among the 3 missing UTAR students who got drowned at about 5.30pm at Batu Berangkai Waterfall when a sudden gush of water swept them away. The waterfall is about 10km away from the collapsed suspension bridge where 3 pupils drowned in the river just a week ago here in Kampar. Looking on is Perak MB, YAB Dato' Seri Dr. Zambry bin Abd. Kadir, wearing black cap.

*I was the first journalist/photographer to reached the scene n got the photo. Nyeh nyeh nyeh!

I’ll upload more pics. Sabar…

COPYRIGHT RESERVED! IF YOU REALLY BETUL-BETUL GILA BABI NEED TO USE THE PHOTO AND NOT FOR COMMERCIAL OR PROFITABILITY OR POPULARITY PURPOSELY, USE LAH BUT PLEASE LET ME KNOW!!

Tq. =p

UTAR students missing at waterfall (update 3)

7.20pm
Breaking news! 3 students from UTAR, Kampar, Perak went missing at Kampar waterfalls. Alert came in at 5.45pm. Rescue and search operation is going on despite the heavy rain. And now i shall head out to the scene!

7.43pm
saya baru menghubungi Balai Polis Kampar untuk mendapatkan maklumat terkini. lokasi kejadian dia Kuala Dipang Waterfall. operasi mencari dan menyelamatkan masih dijalankan. menurut Koperal Suhaimi, 3 pelajar tersebut dikhuatiri telah dihanyutkan. pihak polis meminta bantuan pelajar-pelajar UTAR supaya menghubungi pihak universiti ataupun lecturers supaya berhubung dengan Balai Polis Kampar sekarang. dan saya berharap kita semua doakanlah rakan seuniversiti kita selamat. ok nak keluar pi scene sekarang! lapar..

7.50pm
According to the police, 2 boys and 1 girl were swimming at the waterfall when a sudden flow of water swept 3 of them away. Their male friend who was not in the water with them rushed to ask for help from the police station.

2 november 2009

12.20am
i left the location n headed to Hospital Kampar.

2.50pm
i finally reached home. fuh.. what a day. All 3 bodies have been found-2 boys 1 girls. I was the first ‘journalist’ to reached the scene and I got the pic of the first body and their IC photos. Press asked the pics from me. oh know they know me-Oh Chin Eng, the enthusiastic Journalism student from UTAR. bad things happened too. I fell twice in the jungle n I fell from my bike. Doctor gave me an injection. It’s my first accident and injection in Kampar. During the press conference, MB of Perak, YAB Dato' Seri Dr. Zambry bin Abd. Kadir told the press that I was the one who torched him when he enter the jungle n he asked them to get the pic of the 1st body that was found from me. =p I just had my bfast, lunch, dinner n supper for y’day. Im run out of energy. Thank God Im safe. Im so gald that im still alive. My heart breaks when I see the victim’s family members cried. I love you mum, dad, bro, sis, NF n my frens. Gona pangsai, clean up myself, sleep n wake up at 8am to check my photos in the newsppr and blog abt it. Too tired lah!

4.15am
my roomate, Gan Siang Yong just help me to translate the news in Chinese for me. China Press published the pics with my name on it. hehe. i dun want to be a BANANAMAN! im gona learn Chinese by hook or by crook. yesh!

5.10am
i just bathed n it's raining again..

6.25am
i was google-ing the news from the press. saw the photos i took. the press used it but without crediting me. zzz.. hope that the printed version will have my name on it la. im not trying to be popular but this is ethics and they promised me that they gona put my name of it. afterall i took the photos. gona sleep now. be strong ppl. pray. love. gnite. see ya later. tata.